Dealing with a diagnosis

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    Hi, my first post here. Back in march I was diagnosed with prostate cancer, stage 1. We decided to follow the active surveillance route as I was heading offshore for 8 months for work.
    The few close friends I did tell about the diagnosis just kinda clam up when I try talk to them about it. I don’t have a partner or any immediate family. So yea, it’s pretty much something I’ll be dealing with on my own, have always been very independent.
    I’ve done some reading about treatments and frankly it’s all seems rather scary. I’m only 44, and to face the possible side effects is unimaginable. I still have a two months before I head back to nz, further blood tests and MRI will be done then. I was also given medication to help control the symptoms while I was away.
    Thanks for reading, it’s nice to be able to talk, well kinda talk.


    I think ultimately you do need someone to offload to, whether in person or by this form of communication. Getting answers to questions you didn’t know to ask, talking through it with someone who understands what you are going through etc. Your close friends will be processing the news themselves, you may need to be (more) honest with them and let them know what you need from them. People do genuinely want to help its just that sometimes they have no idea what to do. So tell them 🙂


    Hello Gordy,
    Thanks for your post. It is hard when you’re on your own, and added to that, not even in your own country. Motheroffour is right- people often clam up when they don’t know how to respond or what to say. If your friends are around your age they may not have had much to do with anyone who has had a cancer diagnosis. While understandable, this is hurtful for you as it seems they don’t care. Treatment and side effects sounds scary, but here at the Cancer Society we can provide a lot more information and talk about managing treatment. In Wellington (and other cities) there are support groups for men with prostate cancer to support each other, and we can also link you up by phone to men who have previously gone through the same so you can find out what it was like and ask questions. While you are away, have a look at which is a great website and also have an online community of patients. You are welcome to email the cancer information nurses here at the Cancer Society on When you do return to NZ, the Cancer Society will be here to offer support so you will not need to go through this on your own.
    Kind regards,
    Anna- Cancer Information Nurse


    Thank you for your kind replys. I do intend getting involved with the cancer society when I return to nz, not just to accept their help but try and get involved with what they do.
    It is good being able to talk. It’ll be alright.


    Hi My name is Teresa lafou and i am a mother of three boys and i am 32 years old and this is the first time on this page. A couple of weeks ago I was diagnosed with stomach cancer and it is still sinking in for me and my family. I don’t know what stage I am at but have put a plan in place key whole surgery to see if it has spread and then tell me what stage chemo for 8 weeks surgrey then another 8 weeks off chemo to be honest I am sacred

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